thinking of you, mom, down here in Sisters I’ve never been to such a cowgirl town staying at the bunkhouse with fellow hipsters feel kind of lost here without you around would’ve brought you with me, but I know you’re busy tending the yard and coexisting with dad but I think you’d love these clumps of towering pine trees and I must confess, I’ve been missing you bad mama, can we get a little time this summer? there’s a pretty little town I want to walk around with only you and me oh, mama, we can talk about the past if you wanna but I don’t really feel the need to I just want to hold your hand when we cross the street right after sunset, we walked to the saloon sat outside, drinking IPAs and wine, except for me ’cause I’m still afraid of how love burns up in alcohol something I don’t think I’ll ever unsee didn’t you tell me he drove you through the country? stargazing lovers under cowboy skies I know I can’t bring back what’s dead and gone, mom but I’d like to put these country stars back in your eyes [chorus] looking out the window, down at the shops below I shouldn’t feel so lonesome, but I do ’cause I’m thinking about how you gave me the wings I’d need to fly away from you one day but everywhere I go, you’re just a train of thought away [chorus]

my uncle said, come on over tonight we’re gonna ruin this perfect blue summer air with some bonfire smoke I said, okay Sam, I’ll be over pulled on my boots and blue jeans and drove away singing god bless the US on the radio there’s a sea of strange eyes at his doorway chevys and fords block the driveway just give us some liquor, and in several hours we’ll be family how I’d love to belong here with asbestos in my lungs yes, I’d love to belong here with hard cider on my tongue there’s blood in the cracks and the walls are overdue to be knocked down but I’d love to belong in this beautiful broken country ’cause she feels like home somehow my daddy loves telling stories suburbanite kid in the 50s one afternoon he tried to bleach his black hair blonde he’s out on the porch playing bluegrass he doesn’t recall much Spanish and I am the child of all he’s lost and all he’s found now I’m sitting on blankets with strangers eagerly waiting for nightfall singing don’t you know us, we’re your native sons how I’d love to belong here with gasoline in my lungs yes, I’d love to belong here burning charcoal on my tongue there’s blood on the ground and we’re all too scared to leave our hearts unlocked but I’d love to belong in this beautiful broken country she’s the only home I’ve got the stars are out, I hear gunshots and as colors explode in the sky I can’t help believing that in one sense we might be united ’cause we’d love to belong here with gunpowder in our lungs yes, we’d love to belong here with some kind of pride on our tongues there’s blood on the grass, crime in our past and the bleeding's still going on but we’d love to belong in this beautiful broken country or perhaps just to belong how I’d love to belong in this beautiful broken country or perhaps just to belong

the sky is clear, the wind is cold the trees are turning red and gold a sign on Sauvie Island Road says, come pick you some apples I recall being ten years young trying to eat those sour ones from a store we couldn't afford city rent's a battle come fall, my mom would read to me the tale of Johnny Appleseed I wondered if I’d ever see one growing in real life well, now a wagon drops us off beside a row of Macintosh the air is sweet, the leaves are green against that sunny sky is it too late or can I still grow up here in this place where real things come out of the ground year after year? my heart falls hard for Sauvie Island when the fruit falls and the harvest moon is rising came here from the city, hoping to be changed fall on Sauvie Island comes and makes me who I was again the sun is down, the barn is packed big old line for apple snacks band is playing “Applejack" by good old Dolly Parton I saw her the very first time twelve-inch screen on a Monday night kids at school said country wasn’t cool I hated kindergarten is it too late or can I still grow up here in this place where real truths are sung loud and proud for all to hear? [chorus] is it too late or can I still grow up here In this place where real joy is mine to be found year after year? [chorus] fall on Sauvie Island comes and makes me who I was again

oh, my little darling, shaking in your shiny black shoes, you'll always be a nieta * your abuelita died loving you ** the long day is over now the strange machines have stopped it's okay to look at her she closed her eyes with you in her thoughts and if you're scared, touch her hair she's the same as ever and if you're sad, hold her hand it's not bad to die everyone does, it's all right, my little one it's part of life do you remember the orange ice cream ice cream in the yellow house? do you remember when she said sweet dreams? darling, it's her turn to sleep now the black and white TV shows playing hide and seek in her backyard the smell of the picture books she fell asleep with you in her heart [chorus] do you remember the flying of the kites way up in the sky on a summer day? do you remember when she said be kind? darling, it's gonna be okay and if you're scared, touch her hair she's the same as ever and if you're sad, hold her hand it's not bad to die everyone does, it's all right, my little one it's part of life (3x) [chorus] do you remember her twinkly old eyes? long white hair in a ponytail do you remember her crinkly old smile? my child, promise it's gonna be okay you'll always be a nieta your abuelita died loving you * nieta = granddaughter ** abuelita = grandmother

there's a little white church with a little white sign: free trip to "heaven," details inside i pass it on the way to my folks', and to this day, i still haven't yet redeemed mine there's a foot of fresh snow on the steps to their door daddy helps me in; gotta say, for seventy-four, he sure looks young and scrawny and he smells like marijuan--hey, mom! it's good to see you both, and it's been way too long so get the rise up singing book out and we'll sing 'til the fire goes out after all these wild years, all i really know is we sound like the Carter family damn, it's good to be back home there's a little grey cat in the case of my guitar trying to eat my capo; cats are so bizarre and every ancient in-joke is funnier now that we've got coexistence figured out (more or less) [chorus] after all these wild years, all i really know is we sound like the Partridge family damn, it's good to be back home and to tell the naked truth i don't know if i'd do as good a job as both of you there's a little white church with a little white sign they still haven't changed it; don't ask me why none of us has ever set foot in there, and yet i think we're going to be just fine so get the rise up singing book out and we'll sing until the stars all go out after all these wild years, all i really know is we sound like a real family damn, it's good to be back home

one of these days i’ll have my things all packed you might catch me beaming at the thought of moving on but lest you think i’ve never minded telling you goodbye to be fair, you’ve never seen my face after you’re gone i don’t care if you can’t take me to the airport but i do care that you take care of yourself and if you’re wondering what’s behind my walls of iron it’s nothing that you couldn’t guess, just that once in a while, somebody’s hands pick you up and send you dancing and when the music ends, they put you down and let you go sure doesn’t feel good, but whoever said it should? ’cause once in a while, tears have to fall to make you grow i was a blank slate when i came to you and now i’m preparing to erase myself again but if you can’t see the marks you’ve left in me that’s because they’ve run so deep, they’re part of who i am i don’t know what the almighty’s up there planning but i do know that i must go by myself and if you’re wondering what’s behind my coat of armor it’s nothing that you couldn’t guess, just that [chorus] i don’t know what the almighty’s up there planning all i know is there’s so much i’m gonna miss and if you’re wondering what’s inside my heart of steel it’s really nothing more than this: just that once in my life, your wonderful hands picked me up & sent me dancing but now the song is over, and i have to let you go sure doesn’t feel good, but whoever said it should? ’cause once in a while, tears have to fall to make you grow once in a while, tears have to fall to make you grow once in a while, tears have to fall to make you grow once in a while, children like us just have to grow